2.9.99
It's funny, I had a whole shitload of things that I was going to say, but none of them seems important right now. I'll babble aimlessly for a while and hope that something comes into my mind worth saying.
The house is a shithole. That upsets me mildly. I can't get too exited about it because I am partially to blame for its condition. Yet, when RR left, he had just started to take down the Christmas stuff (yeah, I know. Last year it lingered into May) and in his zeal to depart, left the whole thing in a pile for me to sort. There are shards of the 300 some-odd yards of cedar garland that bite my toes when I walk thru, and well, just mess. Everywhere. I'm tired of it.
RR's idea of cleaning a toilet involves a piece of Charmin, and using it to remove the black curly hairs from the rim of the Porcelain Throne. Give you an idea of how things operate around here? If it weren't for me and my conscientiousness, there would be no polished brass (not that there is a lot to start with) and certainly the whole place would have a faint irritating stench of urine.
As previously mentioned, I'm glad that he's left me alone to fend for myself. That in itself has been tonic. Not very tasty medicine, but some that I've needed to take for a while. I feel an interesting freedom, and a real motivation to do something with my life. What? I don't know, but there is the desire to do something.
Unfortunately right now it is not to be anal retentive and attack the cedar in the upper entry hall.
Isn't it interesting, the entire phenomenon of motivation? What is it that makes us do things? Is it a suppressed urge to create change or is it just the last straw to push us into action? Whatever it is, the prospect is there, here, whatever. For instance, when I started this entry, I did it in Word97, with a zany idea that I could actually publish werdz using it instead of the Netscape Composter that I am currently using.
MondoDesiMistake.
I thought that PageMill was unwieldy. Actually, I'm sure that it is a mighty fine tool. Things appear to be pretty clear from a coding standpoint (as far as I can tell, at least) I'm not abandoning it quite yet, I'm just feeling a need to play with it for a few more hours to find all the little oddities out, and figure out what the hell a bookmark in Word97 parlance is. I got a book, I can do this.
On other fronts, I gotta say that the recent death of King Houssein has left me blue. Think about peaceful countries in the middle east. Jordan? Yup, the only one I can think of too. The world has lost one of its greatest leaders, and that loss strikes me hard. I always get upset when politicos that I like die. I watched Nixon's funeral in Kona on C-SPAN and cried from the start to the finish.
Another unconnected idea. A friend of a friend sent a quite apologetic note to RR and I, stating that "Auntie Sharon" had given us a gift subscription to a magazine called Hero. It's a new one on the market (and yes, that was a hyperlink to their webpage.) They bill themselves as "The Magazine for the rest of us," and indeed I have to agree. For a gay magazine, they spent a huge and significant amount of time talking about a topic that a lot of gay men obsess over. Str8 boiz. Their primary focus is on the lesser-talked about gayboi, the average joe. The guy that wants to have a nice relationship with his hubby, and not make a big deal about it. No smutty ads in the back, and it definitely ranks as a magazine that you can actually show your mother and be proud of.
Plus there was a whole spread of cuuute str8 boiz and dogs. Makes me feel all warm and cuddly inside. After all real men cuddle.... Go down to Borders, flop down $5 and get the thing, K? At least stand there like a dweeb and read the thing.
Gonna go clean the haus now. It's making me crazy. Don't think I'll touch my office, but I gotta have one room in this house where christmas no longer exists and I can walk around without the threat of driving cedar splinters into my toesies. Besides, I'm not feeling verbose or creative today.
The house is a shithole. That upsets me mildly. I can't get too exited about it because I am partially to blame for its condition. Yet, when RR left, he had just started to take down the Christmas stuff (yeah, I know. Last year it lingered into May) and in his zeal to depart, left the whole thing in a pile for me to sort. There are shards of the 300 some-odd yards of cedar garland that bite my toes when I walk thru, and well, just mess. Everywhere. I'm tired of it.
RR's idea of cleaning a toilet involves a piece of Charmin, and using it to remove the black curly hairs from the rim of the Porcelain Throne. Give you an idea of how things operate around here? If it weren't for me and my conscientiousness, there would be no polished brass (not that there is a lot to start with) and certainly the whole place would have a faint irritating stench of urine.
As previously mentioned, I'm glad that he's left me alone to fend for myself. That in itself has been tonic. Not very tasty medicine, but some that I've needed to take for a while. I feel an interesting freedom, and a real motivation to do something with my life. What? I don't know, but there is the desire to do something.
Unfortunately right now it is not to be anal retentive and attack the cedar in the upper entry hall.
Isn't it interesting, the entire phenomenon of motivation? What is it that makes us do things? Is it a suppressed urge to create change or is it just the last straw to push us into action? Whatever it is, the prospect is there, here, whatever. For instance, when I started this entry, I did it in Word97, with a zany idea that I could actually publish werdz using it instead of the Netscape Composter that I am currently using.
MondoDesiMistake.
I thought that PageMill was unwieldy. Actually, I'm sure that it is a mighty fine tool. Things appear to be pretty clear from a coding standpoint (as far as I can tell, at least) I'm not abandoning it quite yet, I'm just feeling a need to play with it for a few more hours to find all the little oddities out, and figure out what the hell a bookmark in Word97 parlance is. I got a book, I can do this.
On other fronts, I gotta say that the recent death of King Houssein has left me blue. Think about peaceful countries in the middle east. Jordan? Yup, the only one I can think of too. The world has lost one of its greatest leaders, and that loss strikes me hard. I always get upset when politicos that I like die. I watched Nixon's funeral in Kona on C-SPAN and cried from the start to the finish.
Another unconnected idea. A friend of a friend sent a quite apologetic note to RR and I, stating that "Auntie Sharon" had given us a gift subscription to a magazine called Hero. It's a new one on the market (and yes, that was a hyperlink to their webpage.) They bill themselves as "The Magazine for the rest of us," and indeed I have to agree. For a gay magazine, they spent a huge and significant amount of time talking about a topic that a lot of gay men obsess over. Str8 boiz. Their primary focus is on the lesser-talked about gayboi, the average joe. The guy that wants to have a nice relationship with his hubby, and not make a big deal about it. No smutty ads in the back, and it definitely ranks as a magazine that you can actually show your mother and be proud of.
Plus there was a whole spread of cuuute str8 boiz and dogs. Makes me feel all warm and cuddly inside. After all real men cuddle.... Go down to Borders, flop down $5 and get the thing, K? At least stand there like a dweeb and read the thing.
Gonna go clean the haus now. It's making me crazy. Don't think I'll touch my office, but I gotta have one room in this house where christmas no longer exists and I can walk around without the threat of driving cedar splinters into my toesies. Besides, I'm not feeling verbose or creative today.
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