9.4.99
Hello all.
I think it was Rudyard Kipling who said "If you can keep your head while all around are loosing their own and blaming it on you…" Well, if that's true, then BROTHER, am I ever a man!
It's like this: Last night, I had one of the most bizarre evenings of my life. As previously mentioned, things were not exactly peachy-keen betwixt RR and I, but in our own way, we're working through some of the stupidity in an effort to either salvage this relationship or bit it a fond aloha.
Derrick has played a huge and significant role in this game. You remember him…I was playing kissy-face with him a while back, which nearly caused my initial divorce. Now, he's returned, not as my romantic interest, but as a curious "father confessor." Actually, it's quite cozy. We're fabulous friends, and he appears to have a sincere interest in maintaining this relationship that RR and I have. More than even myself, Derrick has maintained us and kept me at home here. Kind of a therapist, I guess. Pressing on….
Derrick meets this guy on the Internet, and decided to come to Honolulu to meet him and play with him over this long Labour Day weekend. Eh, cool. He wants to meet RR in person (they had only talked on the telephone previously,) and I was also interested in meeting this young man who had distracted my friend so.
A party was thrown together on the lanai with several of our close friends (both of who know the intimate details of both our marital strife and Derrick's interest in it,) and Derrick and Eric show up and begin to drink.
And drink.
And drink.
And crawl all over people, shoving tongues in various orifices. The entire thing was totally without moral fibre, and I couldn't believe what was going on. I mean, I've seen inebriates, and I was certainly among the ranks on this particular night, but I've never seen someone show up with their bf and attempt to seduce the entire party. It was too bizarre. I ranked it as one of the most awkward evenings of my life. A scene from the show: Eric comes up on my left, Derrick on my right. Eric starts nuzzling my neck, running his tongue around my earlobe. Derrick begins a nearly identical manouvre. Eric attempts to lick my tonsils, but is thwarted by the fact that I have pulled out of this crudity and looked at some very disapproving dinner guests.
Fuck. I was waiting for Harold Pinter to walk in at any second with a dead baby or some shit like that.
I could go on for days telling of this party. I could go on about how I pulled my thumb out of Eric's mouth, and I could tell you about the seductive way that Eric pulled his pants down for some gentle fondling by one of the amused gents.
But there is a reason that I am up at 4AM.
Seems that RR and D disappeared for quite a while, leaving me for idle chitchat with the others. Stoopid me was upstairs telling those assembled that I was not concerned. After all, I trusted RR and Derrick IMPLICITLY and there was less than any reason to doubt their intentions.
Well, after the good-nights were made, and RR and I were in bed, He said that Derrick had started to cry and said that he had fallen in love with him. He felt really, really awkward about that, and wished that it had never happened. I kissed him good night, and lay there in bed for nearly two hours before I got up and started reading The Well of Loneliness by Radclyffe Hall. At one point, RR came down and asked if I was ok.
"No, I'm not."
"Are you sick?"
"No, I feel SO fucking betrayed by Derrick."
He reaffirmed his commitment to me, and tried to make some lame "he was drunk, and maybe that's not what he meant" excuses, but you know what? The Princess just aint dancing with the prince anymore. Drunk is no excuse. You simply don't come to MY house, drink MY booze, fondle MY guests, and try to fuck MY husband. It's not proper.
"You're really upset about this, aren't you?"
"Yes. Yes I am."
I think it was Rudyard Kipling who said "If you can keep your head while all around are loosing their own and blaming it on you…" Well, if that's true, then BROTHER, am I ever a man!
It's like this: Last night, I had one of the most bizarre evenings of my life. As previously mentioned, things were not exactly peachy-keen betwixt RR and I, but in our own way, we're working through some of the stupidity in an effort to either salvage this relationship or bit it a fond aloha.
Derrick has played a huge and significant role in this game. You remember him…I was playing kissy-face with him a while back, which nearly caused my initial divorce. Now, he's returned, not as my romantic interest, but as a curious "father confessor." Actually, it's quite cozy. We're fabulous friends, and he appears to have a sincere interest in maintaining this relationship that RR and I have. More than even myself, Derrick has maintained us and kept me at home here. Kind of a therapist, I guess. Pressing on….
Derrick meets this guy on the Internet, and decided to come to Honolulu to meet him and play with him over this long Labour Day weekend. Eh, cool. He wants to meet RR in person (they had only talked on the telephone previously,) and I was also interested in meeting this young man who had distracted my friend so.
A party was thrown together on the lanai with several of our close friends (both of who know the intimate details of both our marital strife and Derrick's interest in it,) and Derrick and Eric show up and begin to drink.
And drink.
And drink.
And crawl all over people, shoving tongues in various orifices. The entire thing was totally without moral fibre, and I couldn't believe what was going on. I mean, I've seen inebriates, and I was certainly among the ranks on this particular night, but I've never seen someone show up with their bf and attempt to seduce the entire party. It was too bizarre. I ranked it as one of the most awkward evenings of my life. A scene from the show: Eric comes up on my left, Derrick on my right. Eric starts nuzzling my neck, running his tongue around my earlobe. Derrick begins a nearly identical manouvre. Eric attempts to lick my tonsils, but is thwarted by the fact that I have pulled out of this crudity and looked at some very disapproving dinner guests.
Fuck. I was waiting for Harold Pinter to walk in at any second with a dead baby or some shit like that.
I could go on for days telling of this party. I could go on about how I pulled my thumb out of Eric's mouth, and I could tell you about the seductive way that Eric pulled his pants down for some gentle fondling by one of the amused gents.
But there is a reason that I am up at 4AM.
Seems that RR and D disappeared for quite a while, leaving me for idle chitchat with the others. Stoopid me was upstairs telling those assembled that I was not concerned. After all, I trusted RR and Derrick IMPLICITLY and there was less than any reason to doubt their intentions.
Well, after the good-nights were made, and RR and I were in bed, He said that Derrick had started to cry and said that he had fallen in love with him. He felt really, really awkward about that, and wished that it had never happened. I kissed him good night, and lay there in bed for nearly two hours before I got up and started reading The Well of Loneliness by Radclyffe Hall. At one point, RR came down and asked if I was ok.
"No, I'm not."
"Are you sick?"
"No, I feel SO fucking betrayed by Derrick."
He reaffirmed his commitment to me, and tried to make some lame "he was drunk, and maybe that's not what he meant" excuses, but you know what? The Princess just aint dancing with the prince anymore. Drunk is no excuse. You simply don't come to MY house, drink MY booze, fondle MY guests, and try to fuck MY husband. It's not proper.
"You're really upset about this, aren't you?"
"Yes. Yes I am."
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